Poetry Friday: “Monster Supper”
Yes, I realize Halloween is both months away and months behind…but I had to post this now.
You see, back in early January, the creative yet enigmatic M.M. Socks posted a poem titled, “Eyeball Dinner” on his blog. It got me thinking about what else might be served at a dinner that included eyeballs on the menu. But then, of course, I had to carry the concept further in my mind…and wondered what the whole dinner experience might be like.
Hence, the inspiration for “Monster Supper.” Hope you like it! Or are at least able to get all the way through it. Today Sheri Doyle is hosting Poetry Friday, so be sure to visit her blog for links to all of the day’s offerings!
“Monster Supper”
Come, little monsters,
Sit down, take a seat!
Are your hands filthy?
Good!
We can finally eat!
Your mummy has made you
A terrible feast –
So you can grow up
As a strong, healthy beast.
Remember your manners
And don’t sit up straight;
Burp when you want to
But don’t clean your plate.
Put down those forks!
Play with your food!
Talk while you’re chewing
And always be rude.
Have some weed salad
With fried crispy lips!
I cooked up a rump roast
And saved you the hips.
You’ll love these fresh toenails –
The crunch is superb!
Or try some steamed muscles
With butter and Herb.
The sweet pickled pelvis
Is slimy and cold,
The grilled duodenum
Is starting to mold;
There’s liver lasagna,
Hot skeleton stew,
Gall bladder casserole,
Finger rolls, too!
So eat up, my darlings,
And make sure you drool –
But always remember
My dinnertime rule:
If you don’t eat your eyeballs
And finish your dirt,
You can’t have warm chocolate
Spleens for dessert.
- © 2013, Matt Forrest Esenwine
Finger lickin’ good! And so perfect coming from a chef
Fun, fun, fun! That is superb. I bet Penny Klostermann would really like this. If I could just suggest dropping finally, it helps the flow :0)
Thank you both – glad you liked it!
Haha! This is fun-tastic! What great rhythm, too. I laughed out loud that ‘Herb” was capitalized. : )
That’s one of my favourite parts, too, Sheri, so I was hoping others ould get a kick out of it…thanks!
EWW! I almost didn’t make it past the gallbladder casserole!
Well, I’m glad you did! By the way, the finger rolls are made with 100% organic fingers, so they’re very healthy.
The finger rolls were my favorite, until I got to the chocolate spleens. I like that even monsters have to eat dinner before they can have dessert!
Liz, some rules of etiquette are universal.
Suitably gross, loads of fun, and oozing with kid appeal. The thought of crunching on toenails got me and then I got to liver lasagna. Ewww. And if you gotta eat spleens, glad they’re chocolate ones. Have you seen Jessica Swaim’s Scarum Fair?
Thanks, Jama! Not the type of food one would probably find on ‘Alphabet Soup’ – but hey, monsters are people, too! I haven’t heard of Scarum Fair – I’ll have to look it up!
A definite “terrible feast”! But what a fun read.
Oh, the toenails killed me. This was so much fun, Matt. Are you sure you’re not related to some zombies — it was *all too real.*
Some of my favorite disgusting bits:
I cooked up a rump roast
And saved you the hips.
The grilled duodenum
Is starting to mold;
Has anyone used “duodenum” in a poem before? If not, I think we should give you some sort of prize! The Dubious Duodenum Award of Distinction, perhaps.
Thank you, all! Tabatha, I don’t know if anyone’s used that word – but I figured it was about time someone did. May I suggest we call the award, The Dubious Duodenum Award of Disphinction? Because, well…y’know…
Hilarious! I love the lines:
“Burp when you want to
But don’t clean your plate.”
Words I’ve never uttered as a mother, but ones my girls would love me to say! Thanks for the grins. =)
Thanks, Bridget!
I think my boy students would love this monster supper. The more disgusting the better. The rhythm and rhyme work well together.
Glad you liked it, Margaret!
Scrumptious rumps and strips of hips
Stale toenails and chips of lips
Such a garish, ghastly feast
Perfect for the just deceased!
What I really wanted to say ‘was Finger-licking Good!’ but Renee beat me to it (as usual).
Nice job, Matt!
Thanks, Vikram! Fried lip chips are the BEST, aren’t they? Especially the nacho cheese ones.
Ewww, the “sweet pickled pelvis!” My students would love this one. Thanks!
Ewww gross never tasted so good. Nice job, Matt!
Thank you both!
What? No ribs? I was going to say “cute poem”…. but it doesn’t seem to fit! Um…. Brute poem?
Actually, I had a bunch of other items – including ribs, thighs, and breasts – that I cut because I didn’t want to overdo the food aspect.
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