That right there is the basic response I want to give everyone who says, “Oh, your 5-year-old is in school now? That must be great!”
Excuse me, but why is it so great?
Of course, I’m proud of her being excited about school and I’m happy she’s enjoying it as much as she is. But more often than not, the insinuation in comments such as this post’s title is that parents are glad to get the kids out of the house. This is particularly evident when summer vacation comes to an end and people everywhere start talking about how they can’t wait for their children to be back in school.
Why is everyone in such a rush to not be around their kids?
You spend countless years, dollars, and headaches raising these little humans (some folks spend years just trying to conceive)…and now you’re counting down the hours until they’re out of the house?
When I left full-time employment in radio back in July 2012, my son was only 2 1/2 and my daughter hadn’t even been conceived. So right away, the kids and I have spent all kinds of time together: running errands around town, going to library story time, playing at the park, etc.
Unlike my son, my daughter never experienced a daycare whatsoever; the closest she came was when she began preschool last year, and that was only 3 hours a day, two days per week. From the moment she woke up until the moment she went to sleep, she was a part of my everyday existence. Except for the rare occasion – a weekend conference here or there or a 2-hour book signing now and then – she was by my side, constantly.
This is why being alone in the house was not something I was eagerly anticipating. Disclaimer: I would be lying if I said there were not any aspects of the new arrangement that were enticing. I could write, research publishers, market myself, and get more voiceover work done all in the same day – and not have to wait until the kids were in bed before I started. Yes, this promise of a new work schedule was captivating, to say the least.
And so far, things have been working out well, even though I still haven’t quite nailed down a regular routine; I’ve sent out more manuscripts, I have a couple of editors interested in a couple of different manuscripts, I’ve been able to do more marketing, and I’m fleshing out some ideas for new stories. The writer’s life is good, right now!
But still, all this comes with a price: the loss of time with my 5-year-old.
I realize this is life. She’s getting taller, smarter, and more mature every day – and will continue to spend more and more time away from home until she eventually is no longer here at all. The same goes for my 8-year-old son. I figure we only have about 10 years before he’s graduating college and heading off to film school to produce the next Jurassic dinosaur movie. (yes, that’s his plan!)
I see no need to rejoice in the speed of life. As futile as it may be, I’d much rather do what I can to slow it down. Our kids will learn soon enough how hectic, crazy, and unforgiving the world can be.
Let them enjoy the solace of home a little longer.
THREE DAYS LEFT
for the “Flashlight Night”
I have THREE personally-signed copies of Flashlight Night (Boyds Mills Press, 2017) I’m giving away! If you’d like to enter to win, check out last week’s post celebrating the book’s FIRST YEAR birthday…with three opportunities to win, why wouldn’t you want to enter??
Ordering personalized signed copies online? Oh, yes, you can!
You can purchase personalized signed copies of Flashlight Night, (Boyds Mills Press, 2017), Don’t Ask a Dinosaur (Pow! Kids Books, 2018), and nearly ALL of the books or anthologies I’ve been part of!
Just click the cover of whichever book you want and send the good folks at MainStreet BookEnds in Warner, NH a note requesting the signature and to whom I should make it out to. (alternatively, you can log onto my website and do the same thing) They’ll contact me, I’ll stop by and sign it for you, and then they’ll ship it. Try doing that with those big online booksellers! (Plus, you’ll be helping to support local book-selling – and wouldn’t that make you feel good?)
Thank you to everyone for your support!
- NY Public Library’s “100 Best Book for Kids 2017” AND “Staff Pick!”
- KIRKUS Starred review!
- Kansas NEA Reading Circle Recommended Books!
- “Best Reads of 2017,” Unleashing Readers
- Amazon “Best Books of the Month,” Sept. 2017
- Positive reviews from Horn Book, School Library Connection, Booklist, Publisher’s Weekly, and Shelf-Awareness
- “Rollicking rhyme!” – Booklist
- “A wild romp!” – Parenting NH Magazine
- “Cute…intriguing…4 out of 5 stars” – Tulsa Book Review
- “Rhythmic…funny and informative” – Unleashing Readers
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8 thoughts on ““Yes, my daughter has started kindergarten, and NO, I’m not completely happy about it.””
I’m with you, Matt! Finding our kids’ company delightful leaves us in an ambivalent position. I’m sure you will get the most out of every day.
Hi Tabatha, I think you mean “Not finding”…but yes, I agree. I do love being able to work, but I’m not exactly rejoicing about getting the kids out of the house!
You are a great dad, Matt! It’s good to hear that, in fact, some parents actually LIKE to be with their kids. You will all find your new normal soon, and your kids will know that you are always there to cheer them on. Looking forward to your future books.
Thank you, Jane! I’m glad I’m not alone in my point of view.
“I see no need to rejoice in the speed of life.” And now I’m thinking similar thoughts about grandchildren! My oldest, a grandson, is a senior & off to college next year, & now the younger ones I spend time with are 9 & 7 & changing every week. Your words of trying to figure out a schedule connect with me in retirement. I don’t have to clean on Sat. morning anymore, but when? etc. etc. I love that you’ve cherished those times, Matt, sounds like another picture book but for parents?
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Linda – it just might be a good PB for grown-ups, eh? The years do fly by. I remember taking care of my daughter when she was still an infant, bringing her to library story time in her detachable car seat while her brother sat in the circle…and now he’s the king of nonfiction and she’s learning to spell! What happened to those 5 years in-between??
So nice to hear this, Matt. I wish more parents knew how to enjoy these years. I realize there may be reasons that make day care a must, but savoring our children when they are young is such a blessing. I’m glad you took the opportunity to express that.
Thank you, Karen. I realize many parents need two incomes to make ends meet…but we thought so, as well, until I crunched the numbers and realize that I was netting $150 a month, working 45-50 hours per week! It was insanity!